There has been a big group of tiny little girls born in our church recently- and there’s nothing more satisfying and quick to knit than little girl hats. I adore making little girl hats.
I really like making bows, too. I think they make it a bit more feminine- and I also like making girl hats out of non-traditional girl type colors. Not everything they own has to be pink!
Pictures to come soon of Erika, Ezra, Josetta and my mom’s trip over this weekend- we had a blast!
I tried out a few different versions of this wave before I really figured it out, but I think I’ve got it down now.
It’s for a cute little lady who was just born (Welcome, Eleanor!) and is getting showered with gifts this week.
Writing up the pattern for “the wave” is on my to-do list (10 miles long…) and I actually have 2 more hats, a blanket AND a sweater to show you all, just need to sit down and take pictures of them first. But most exciting is that Erika, my mom, Josie and Ezra are coming to visit this weekend and I couldn’t be more excited to see them! Christmas was a long time ago and I feel like Sam has changed so much in the last few months and just exploded with new words and phrases (He counts to 3 now, and says “Love you!” Which sounds more like ‘Yuv yooo’, but it’s still the greatest thing I’ve ever heard before.) Four more days! Four more days!!!
We had a great Easter- we were able to spend it with my aunt and uncle and my cousin and his family.
Sam even got to wear his very first suit!
The pants were pretty big on him, so his shirt wouldn’t stay tucked in, but I still think he was the most dashing little man at church! I even got up the gumption to curl my own hair!
We also had crazy-nice weather, extremely sunny and warm, which for end of March in Moscow could mean snow, could mean sunburn- you just never know! We lucked out big time! I worked Saturday, so I had to miss Sam’s first Easter Egg hunt, apparently he wasn’t really into it, he didn’t quite get the point, which at his age is pretty understandable. But he does love opening the plastic eggs! He got two Easter baskets (One from Paul’s mom and one from Paul’s Dad and stepmom) and so he’s been getting lots of treats. The kid goes nuts for chocolate! (Hmmm wonder who he got that from… ceeertainly not the Kvale side!!!)
But today Sam and I are home sick. We’re both getting over an upper respiratory thing which has us both coughing lots. He’s on hour #3 of napping and I just got the house in order- which is hard if you have to stop to cough every 30 seconds! So I think I’ll drink some tea, knit and watch some Netflix instead.
We went on a day trip to Spokane to see Paul’s sister Carrie off as she was leaving for Ohio. We went up a little early so we could hang out at the park and have some fun. We couldn’t have asked for nicer weather! Sam was very insistent about walking the majority of the time.
This was the face he made every time we made him go in the stroller.
Yes. He has a pink stroller. It was on sale. It is awesome! (It’s a Baby Jogger.)
Sam loves to pretend to talk on cell phones. It’s a great trick to get him to wait for our food to come.
On the drive up we got to see the new windmill things pretty up close! They’re ginormous.
On the way home we followed the GPS…it lead us a different way than we normally would have gone, because we didnt know how to get out of the neighborhood we were in..well, it ended up taking us back roads for half the way and it was terrifying. Dirt and gravel roads in the middle of Idaho in the winter at 10pm, not seeing another car for 30 minutes, we were both worried because we had no idea where we were, then suddenly after an hour of backroads we finally got onto the ‘real’ highway and were still over an hour from home! It was a good thing Sam was so tuckered out from a long day of playing and walking so he slept the ENTIRE time. I had a stomach ache by the time we got home because I was so worried we’d end up in a ditch somewhere with no cell reception and we’d only had our new van for a few weeks and weren’t super familiar with it yet, but hallelujah we made it home in one piece and still alive! And now we know not to follow the GPS trying to get out of Spokane Valley…
So I thought I had a better idea for a fox hat, but I’m not liking this one as much as I thought I would.
I think the eyes need to be lower. It does look a bit better on a head, but I made it too small for Sam- rookie mistake. I’ll try for round three and see what happens.
Also, I dyed my hair platinum. It was time for a change, and while I liked the red, it was time to go blonde again!
Also, it’s spring and currently snowing. Awesome.
I’m not a great mom. Don’t get me wrong, I love my kid. He is fed, he is clean, he is happy, but I’m not a great mom. I am impatient. I am selfish. I’m temperamental. I don’t like being woken up at night and I lose my cool quickly when I am tired or hungry (and I am usually one or the other.) I often feel as though I am not doing ‘enough’. He often watches a TV show once I pick him up from the babysitters because I can’t muster up the energy to run around the backyard and play with him. But we carry on. You can’t give up or take a day ‘off’ of being a parent. 1 year olds aren’t very good at waiting around for you to get your act together to parent. It’s hands on. It’s in the trenches. It’s pb&j in your hair, yogurt on your shirt, drool on your pants and I think I just stepped on a fruit-snack.
Sometimes it hits me that , holy cow, GUYS, THEY LET ME HAVE A KID. (I’m not sure who “they” are, though) I thought a few times right after Sam was born, especially after my mom left and Paul went back to work and I was home alone for the first time. “Um… they trust me enough to leave me on my own with a newborn?” WHAT. And then suddenly that new baby is 18 months old and talking and communicating and being hilarious and awesome. And I still don’t know how to be a ‘mom’. Some of it comes naturally, when he cries, check his diaper, make sure he’s fed, etc. Baby was easy. But now that he’s got more personality and I need to be doing things like teaching him manners, teaching him to not throw fits, how to obey, to listen to his mama, etc I’m finding it increasingly difficult. I thought it would come naturally to me, I’ve always thought I was cut out to be a mom, but man, this is hard work. You know, at least attempt to help them grow up to be a functioning member of society, but no pressure, right? And then there’s the thousands of different ways you can parent, do this, do that, don’t do this, don’t do that, and most of all don’t do this one particular thing because then your kid will grow up to be a psychopath, all because you let him cry in his crib? Whaaaaaaa?
Though we have crappy days and I am overwhelmed at the thought that I am in charge of taking care of a real-live human being, I am constantly humbled and blessed by so many women (in my family and in my community) who show me in very real ways what it’s like to be a parent. How to be selfless and how to be kind and gentle, even when you don’t feel like it. To be constant and consistent with discipline and love. And that’s not an easy job. Though I may not be a ‘great mom’ yet, I am working on it- working on patience and humility, love and kindness, and trying to remember that Sam is a person, too. Not just a ‘baby’, but a person with real emotions and real needs and needs real love. He needs my attention more than Facebook or blogging. He needs me to show him how to respect and love and care for others and how to be nice. And we’re both a work in progress.
Sheesh. Who put me in charge anyway?
I made an ultra plush blanket for sweet baby Hugh Dowers.
My model was quite unwilling to help me show this off, but he did let me borrow his Rody Horse. So, there’s that.
It was a hard color to capture on camera, but I think the last picture is the most true to color. Apple green with a crisp white stripes. This thing is seriously soooo squishy and soft. I am in love with this yarn!
Hugh also received a little stripey beanie, although Im not sure how much use they’ll get out of it in the spring in California!
And also a HUGH congratulations to my bestie Autumn who gave birth to baby Isaac James on Tuesday, March 12th. He is BEAUTIFUL and I can’t wait to meet him!
I took being a stay at home mom for granted. I could come and go as I pleased, I had enough time to keep the house in order, to keep the kitchen well stocked, dinner made, the toddler entertained. Not so much these days. I always feel as though my head is just barely above water, and that there are a lot of things that are being neglected. It’s either a clean house or a happy kid. It’s making a cup of coffee instead of prepping dinner so I don’t fall asleep at 6pm. It’s being content with a messy house and embracing the fact that things are a little disorganized right now and probably will be for a while.
…And then there’s the guilt. Letting someone else have my kid for the majority of the day. I feel so incredibly guilty that I don’t get to be the one to spend the day with him.I know he is happy hanging out with his buddy (He is watched by one of my close friends who has a son very close in age) and I know it’s good for him to socialize, but I just can’t get over the guilt of not being there for him all the time. I don’t feel like I am doing anything ‘well’ right now. I feel like I am half-assing it at being a mom, half-assing it at work, half-assing it at being a wife. Especially with all of Sam’s heath issues right now. (He is getting over a double ear infection, a sinus infection AND a horrible case of the croup. He’s on antibiotics and had some steroids so things are shaping up!)
It doesn’t help when people say things like “Oh wow, I don’t know how you do that. I could *never* do that. I’d miss my kid too much.” or “I don’t want someone else raising my child for me”. And to an extent, I can agree. I didn’t think I “could” do that. But hey, you learn to do what you have to do when you run out of other options. It really stings when people say things like that, I already feel guilty enough about missing milestones, new words and fun new skills. And part of me just feels sorry for myself for having to be at work around 6am every day, which means getting up before the crack of dawn, being in a rush whenever I am at home and not spending as much quality time with him as I should/want to.
But right now I am just trying to focus on the “Be thankful” part. Being thankful we can pay our rent, that we have reliable cars, that we can buy groceries and clothing, that we have good health insurance. I am trying to be thankful, even though that means my floors don’t get vacuumed and the dishes sit in the sink for a few days. I have to remind myself that there’s only 24 hrs in a day, and at least six of those need to be sleeping hours. Do you know how hard it is to try to go to bed at a reasonable hour when you’re married to a night owl and he’s been successfully pushing back your bedtime for the last 3.5 yrs?
Any other working mama’s out there that can share some advice? Or even just words of encouragement would be more than welcome!
I’ll be back to your regularly scheduled knitting posts just as soon as a certain somebody in California (cough, cough MARY cough, cough) receives their package, then I can show you the contents that I made for baby Hugh!
And yes, I used the word “ass” three times in this post. Can you believe it?